Ignorance is Chris

If I had my own show on Discovery Channel, I think it would be something like "Ignorance is Chris". I would pitch it as a show that is intended to inform and educate the average television enslaved American; hosted by me, the aforementioned American.



We'll discover hidden cities not commonly found on a map, like Rhode Island. It would be cram packed with pyrotechnics (in order to keep everyone's attention) while we adventure into activities that most people from my generation might not know anything about. Things like how to change a tire. Or more importantly, where is it and why can't I buy a new one thru Amazon? How about my Borders savings card?

The show will shift focus on a variety of everyday topics that we face i. e., finances, economy, weather, fireworks (there's a demographic), cereal,  historical monuments, maxim, vegetables, ethnicities etc.

I can also build brainpower with some interesting trivia on subjects like Malcolm X, Xbox 360, box cutters,  and tandem bicycles.

As host I can't just rely on my natural charm, and will keep things moving along with some mild mannered journalism. I'll be able to ask questions like:
Why? And that is...? Where the hell am I? What is that on there? What do you mean?
So you think I'm the father?  That's what she said. You think that's safe for 8 people to use at once? and Haaaave you met my friend Ted? (Zing!)

Every show would end the same. I would look into the camera and give a send off. Something clever and classy like, "Ay-ooo! Straight from this smart ass to your dumb ass!" or "Ay-oo!"

Ahh. I know it's a lot of work, but would be cool.
Maybe I'll just read more.